Late post about my dazzling Prom Night :D

Jakarta, June 26th 2011

Swable 2011 Prom Night

Our ticket

First boy photo with me. 

Actually he's not my friend younger than me. 

He looks like Fqr.

Hello Fadhil :)

Before show off 

Irsan looks like Nobleman.

Be <3

Belle on gown

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ini cerita ending. Akhirnya yah........

Maaf nih yak sebelumnya gue demen banget curhat. Abis wadah curhatan cuman disini hehe :p. 

Dari postingan sebelumnya pasti tau banget hubungan gue itu kemaren kemaren ngegantung yak. Galau galau gajelas. Gapunya kerjaan jadinya gue curhat di blog. Kasian yah. Ah ga apa deh siapa tau gue jadi blogger terkenal hehe *maunya*. Yaudah mulai deh ceritanya......

Gue sama Fiqar itu hampir 2mingguan gantung gajelas. Ya itu deh gara-gara masalah abis dari Jogja. Awalnya gue kira Fiqar ngindar dari masalah dan pengen lewatin gitu aja. Ternyata gue salah. Fiqar bukan ngindar tapi dia butuh waktu dan cari waktu yang tepat.

Akhirnya waktu yang tepat itu Kamis, 23 Juni 2011 dia ke rumah gue. Gue yang minta kalo misalnya mau nyelesain masalah di rumah gue aja biar clear sekalian kalo di tempat umum gitu kan ga mungkin ntar orang pada kepo ada apa gue dengan doi. Awalnya gue takut banget nerima kenyataan pait kaya gini. Gue udah tau akhirannya kaya gimana. Intinya gue udah ikhlas bakalan gimana. Daripada gajelas kaya gini makan hati gileee.

Ketakutan yang gue pikiran ternyata ga kejadian. Tapi awalnya dia di rumah canggung, aneh, apa ya asing mungkin kata yang tepat buat mendeskripsikannya. Mungkin gue doang yang ngerasa. Fiqar emang kaya gini ga ngerasa apa apa. Dia yang mencairkan suasana jadi kaya biasa banget. Biasa, selayaknya orang pacaran. Saat itu gue bener-bener ga ikhlas banget kalo dia pergi. Fiqar minta dipeluk, Fiqar kangen, gue juga kangen bangeeeeeetan. Lean into his arm. Nyium wangi badannya yang khas (mungkin gue doang yang suka, soalnya tenoooot). Dengerin detak jantungnya keras banget. Lama banget meluknya. Seakan gamau pisah. Apalagi gue gamau banget Fiq. 

Akhirnya gue ngomong maunya gimana bla bla. Fiqar ceritain kejadiannya gimana harus sampe kaya gini. Gue tanya trus akhirannya kaya gimana. Dia bilang yaudah sendiri sendiri dulu. Gue ga kuat banget. Gue nangis seenggukan gabisa ngomong. He kisses me just for calmed me. Yak nangis gue makin menjadi jadi. Ga kuat harus kehilangan orang yang gue seriusin banget. Fiqar nenangin gue ngomong segala macem segalanya bakal baik -baik aja. Selalu komunikasi. Bla bla bla. Ngomongin masa depan kaya gimana. Itu yang bikin gue tenang dan percaya sama dia. Mudah mudahan beneran amin. 

Gue ga kuat. The last kiss and hug. Fiqar gamau lepas melukin gue. Gue makin gakuat, tapi harus mau kaya gimanapun. It's supposed to be. Mudah mudahan jadi hikmah semua ini. Gue jadi lebih baik dan Fiqar jadi lebih baik lagi. Amin. Ini cerita belum selesai mudah mudahan ntarnya jadi Happy Ending. Who knows. Let's say AMIN :)

Last words: Aku tetep sayang kamu kok Lik :'(

Video ini lagi gua banget!

Check this lyric.

I can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it’s going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you’ve never met anyone
who is as negative as I am sometimes

I am the wisest woman you've ever met.
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected.
I have the bravest heart that you've ever seen
And you've never met anyone
Who's as positive as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

I blame everyone else, not my own partaking
My passive-aggressiveness can be devastating
I'm terrified and mistrusting
And you’ve never met anyone as,
As closed down as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

What I resist, persists, and speaks louder than I know
What I resist, you love, no matter how low or high I go

I'm the funniest woman you've ever known.
I am the dullest woman you've ever known.
I'm the most gorgeous woman you've ever known
And you've never met anyone as, as everything as I am sometimes.

You see everything, you see every part
You see all my light and you love my dark
You dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can’t relate
And you’re still here

And you’re still here
And you're still here...

Last message on Wednesday, June 22nd 2011. 10.58

Awalnya sms ngomongin gimana besok mau nyelesain masalah. Besok gabisa ketemu kalo pagi. Kalo sore bisa ketemu.

L: Aku besok mau ke imigrasi fiq gabisa pagi loh.

F: Ngapain kamu ke kantor imigrasi?

L: Mau ngurusin paspor fiq.

F: Kamu mau kemana lik?

L: Mau kehatimu~ hehe :p

F: Serius! Aku juga mau pergi tapi gaboleh sama ayah ibu :(

L: Hehe ntar aja aku kasih tau. Kamu mau kemana? Ah ayah ibu kamu kan konservatif banget fiq. Kasian kamu.

F: Mau kehatimu lah lieke. Tapi susah ya lik :(

It's supposed to be. Allah sayang kita fiq. Mudah mudahan jalannya yang dikasih terbaik ya :)

I'm feeling frail.

There's no need to argue anymore. I gave all I could, but it left me so sore. And the thing that makes me mad. Is the one thing that I had.

I knew. I'd lose you. You'll always be special to me. Special to me, to me. 

And I remember all the things we once shared. Chatting on msn all night long. Sat together in the train. Having breakfast for 7days. Struggling. Learning. Will I forget in time? You said I was on your mind? You break it.

Will you hold on to me. I am feeling frail. Will you hold on to me. We will never fail. Be the one I need. Be the one I trust most. Don't stop inspiring me. Sometimes it's hard to keep on running. We work so much to keep it going. Don't make me want to give up. Keep holding my hand. It's so we don't get separated

History chat :'(

file:///C:/Documents%20and%20Settings/user/My%20Documents/lagilagidanlagi805420365.html

Tried to make up. And It's my first :)

With Nabila and make a lil photo session 

It's me. Not bad at all right?

Quotes today!

Kalau single bangun diri sendiri itu lebih baik 

13 attack!

One half year with ya. Since we decided to make realitionship. I'm so glad with ya. I'm so different with ya. You changed from my bad to be right. I saw ur dark and ur white. Makin' love with you in the future its just dream to me. As I guess its true. We're stubborn. This is our problem. We never get way out. In other way, ur family esp. ur parents so conservative, obsession, and pretty realigious. I doubt really doubt about us. We have dreams but it just a dream never be real :(. We made promises but you break it. Is it fake love dear? We're fine. Not in around you. Can we dream together? Can we make voyage anymore? I really want be with you. I don't wanna floating and blur lyk now. Just like my nightmare. I wish we could be lyk a happy couple anymore. I swore we can prove that we fine and we can. I miss ya fiq